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I hear this a lot.  It used to come from a man who is telling his woman not to listen to her single friends telling her that she has a no good man.  But these days I hear everyone saying it, both men and women..  And I’m sitting on the bus stop just watching the people pass me by.  I’m watching all you unhappy non single mthfkers from a distance. The real question should be: Why Are They Always Hating ON Single people? Are they mad that we are single, unattached and happy or something..  I think they want us smart single people to join them in their misery.

The average person’s relationship scenario is so simple..

Man meets woman at the mall. Man is impressed that the woman isn’t buying anything and she’s just window shopping.. He also likes the way that tight fighting sweater forms around her ample breast and the way her azz bulges out the back of her pants.. Plus she doesn’t have any visible tattoos, she’s low maintenance and she said she was single with no kids.. Perfect..  Woman is impressed with the man’s mannerisms and he didn’t walk up to her asking “what did you buy me?”. Plus he even told her that he was pretty. He didn’t call her sexy like those other lames dudes do..  Man isn’t the finest but she is tired of not having anyone to take her to get ice cream cones over the weekend and if she watches the Lifetime Channel for one more week without a break she might suddenly start to hate men.. So a number gets exchanged.

Man wonders how much he’s going to have to spend before he can hit that.. Hopefully not that much.. They now go out on a few mundane dates full of fake laughter ..  Bored, but at least they aren’t sitting at home alone.  Girl isn’t really into guy but he’s better then nothing.. Guy is on his fourth date and he can’t wait to hit.  Woman is definitely going to make him wait 90 days cause she read that one book.  Let’s just say that unlike most women she’s not sexing a “smarter” guy on the side..“ Meanwhile her hormones are raging after watching a movie with Idris Elba in it, and man is calculating how much he’s spent and this is the 5th time he’s been over her house sitting on her couch eating pizza and watching a movie, so he becomes aggressive and woman gives in..  Sex wasn’t explosive or anything but it was sex..  Now they’ve had sex woman tells man that they have to be boyfriend and girlfriend now.. Man agrees cause he doesn’t want to not get the goodies again, plus she’s a good Christian woman.  Besides that she has her B.A. from Purdue the same place he “happended” to attend.

After a few months they:  Now this is where the story gets interesting cause you get to pick the end.. 

A. The sex has gotten even more mundane and one of them deems it’s time to cut the other off.

B.  They both die of boredom together and no one even notices.

C.  Because the man is always nice to the woman and never calls her names and has brought her flowers one time she deems him as a good man and  she wants to marry him.. Man says hey, I guess I don’t have anything better to do I may as well.. Plus she’s a good Christian woman. They marry and then divorce 1 year later after having argument after argument and no longer being able to stand the sight of one another.

I could go on and on with these dumb scenarios that people get themselves into just because they don’t want to be alone..  Meanwhile the smart single people are watching you go in and out of relationship after relationship not knowing your worth and barely even knowing what you want..

I find it crazy sometimes how someone can look at me and actually think that I can’t get a man that makes $35,000 a year to love me like crazy and marry me..  People tend to not understand that not everyone is as simple as they are.. Everyone has certain things that make them happy…

A lot of single people simply are unwilling and uninterested in dealing with BS for society’s sake.. They know their worth, they know what they want and they are simply going to wait until someone comes along who can fulfill them to the point where they can see themselves in a long=term LIFELONG relationship with them..   It’s impossible to know what it truly takes to make you happy in a relationship and at the same time jump in and out of one.

So truth be told SINGLE people are smarter than you.. Those are the people who know what it takes to make a relationship work.. Why get into one if you can see it’s not going to work from the beginning..

People put up with so much BS just to be in a relationship.. They really act like it’s the Holy Grail to be married. And it’s not like their goal is to marry a mega-millionaire.. The goal is to darn there marry any ole body..   What they actually specialize in how to stay in a horrible relationship and pretend it’s all good. People have to wake up sometime, but until then the single people will be chilling, patiently waiting and laughing at you and your “perfect” relationship..