In order to change your life you have to change the people in it. One must seek out new sources of information and people who will help you change yourself in order to improve your life.

Ladies, if you are lost, if you are looking to improve your life, If you don’t know what to do to get to where you would like to go, if you need some advice on how to be successful. Shanel Cooper Sykes is the Answer.

She is just the right lady to get you on the path to becoming a successful and valuable woman.

Miss Cooper is funny, confident, fabulous, intelligent, bold and so many other wonderful things. She has changed the lives of many women since she started her videos online a few years ago. AskKissy.com sat down with Shanel Cooper Sykes and learned all about her Stiletto University empire.

What is stilettos in the kitchen “The Life of Being an Extraordinary Woman about?
“It is a womens empowerment book. Designed to teach women how to be sexy and savy in the kitchen and in their lives. It’s more than just a cookbook. It’s a guide. The first book was done 3 years ago but I have revamped it and now it’s Stilettos in the Kitchen the Life of Being an Extraordinary woman.”

Inspiration behind book? ”I moved to New York City and my plan was to model and act and do makeup. I became depressed, I started writing and had no intent of publishing, but it turned into a book. Everything in the book that I talk about I was experiencing, so it comes from a place of real sincerity.”

“Everything that I’ve gone through in my journey from men, dealing with money, trying to make my dreams happen to getting my body in order (I used to be out of shape and unhealthy) It took me on a spiritual journey.. I think I went through all those trials, failures and tribulations because God wanted me to  teach from it”.

Reality TV is really big right now. Mainly Basketball Wives.  How do you feel about the perception that these shows are putting out there to young women?

“Honestly , it disgusts me. It irritates me and makes me cringe when I see the ignorance and the horrible portrayal of black and ethnic women being put on television right now. It’s sickening and it’s heartbreaking. It’s a disgrace and a embarassment to be a black woman. There is another side that goes unseen. 

She continues:“Whoever is producing the shows is only protraying the negative element of their lives. I would love to see the other side of their lives where they are happy and loving each other. Show them mending their relationship with husbands or flat out saying, “I don’t want to be with you but I forgive you and I let go of this relationship.”

“A lot of women in general see it and want that life. That is thier only example of greatness, of marriage and living a fabulous life. So women are trying to model that and it’s absolutely horrible.”  Shanel would like to change this perception by doing her own show. “My goal is to show what it takes to be a fabulous woman who has money, rocks Louboutins and has all the men that want her. I want to show another side of that life.”

Does your current school Stiletto University teach women how to become this fabulous woman who has all of these fancy things? “Stiletto university is a online school of extraordinary women. It’s  made up of a group of women who  not only want to change thier lives but have made the decision to be a extraordinary woman. Class is every week. I teach it live online:”

Shanel says that the same way you can recognize a AKA on the street you will be able to recognize a Stiletto University graduate.

Shanel showing her students how to make lime steak and lavender mashed potatoes

“When I started out I was speaking to women 20-25 but it has grown to women who are 50 years old, women married with children down to women who are 17-18 getting ready to attend college..

“There are women from Australia, Canada and all around the world in my classes. Any woman who is open to receiving my message is welcome to join. “

How should a woman react when she finds out her mate is cheating on her? First of all I don’t believe there is a such thing as cheating. Relationships are not a game. If we stop looking at our relationships like a game we can bridge the separation between us.

Shanel feels something is missing in our relationships: ”I think what is missing is understanding and communication. Understanding that men and women have different wants needs and desires. Our bodies and minds are made differently. People grow and they go with the ebb and flow of life. “

As a woman you should understand the ebb and flow of your mans life.”

“If it comes to a point where he has gone outside of the parameters of the relationship that you guys have set for yourself. then a conversation needs to had. You need to figure out why. Figure out whats lacking or what stage he is in in his life. and u understand that. OF course it hurts, I’m not saying it’s ok baby it’s ok to cheat. What I am saying it’s a painful process that the woman will have  to go through.”

“Real love holds no record of wrong doing.”  Shanel believes that this approach will minimize the possibility of a man stepping out on his woman because he knows that his woman understands him.

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