13 Jul 2011
Posted by Educated Black Man 
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After reading a article it was a relief to know I was not the only black man who felt this way.
I am 28, bachelors degree, works in banking, Real estate investor, muslim, and goal oriented. I said that first not to brag but to prove that I have something to offer and I am not one of those people who want, want, want and want. Dont get me wrong by no way am I rich and I tell my dating partners look right now I am not where I want to be financially but I am striving to get there. I feel that we all want security male and female.
As far as the women I’ve been meeting it seems like they all have sad storys you know oh my baby daddy changed after we had the baby (by the way he is a drug dealer), my baby daddy wont get a job (he did not have a job when you 2 were screwing) , and all my baby daddys lock that (wow so you keep meeting with losers and mating).
Women these days consider the educated black man corny and the man on the streets dodging bullets the man of their dreams. I personally refuse to settle because when you settle for less you get less than what you settled for.
All I want is a woman with a God Fearing, Big Booty, Career oriented ,Goals, Educated preferbly no kids (i want to experience parent hood with a 1st time parent) Definately not multiple kids by multiple men. I mean have some self respect and self value.
A friend of mine told me to get a Girl you need to wear what they wear you know Gucci, Louis Vuitton, marc jacobs shades. I advised him I did not want a designer whore are someone who is materialistic because I feel like swag, clothes and cars dont raise children people raise children. He said nah man the girl wearing that probably has money and she will mess with you because your swag matches her swag. #fail
I told him if I could afford those things I would not do it I rather have a educated woman who shops at walmart. And unlike women who take advise from people they have no business taking advice from I evualated the person telling me this he has a baby momma who is uneducated. I politely declined his opinion due to the fact I want a family and success is the only option.
Enough of the Sad stuff I live in Charlotte, NC. I think the solution is for someone to put a educated speed dating event together, or a educated social event I thought it was me due to I was not getting out but I am running across alot of male/females with the same issue. The club for us in not a issue due to you usually meet a insane person that their is no future just sex. dont get me wrong I will take the sex but talking to that person will be torture due to they have nothing intelligent to say.
Do you fellas feel the same? Why cant Good People meet Good people? I’ve even tried craigslist dating but that is a Fat girl playgorund. I am to cheap to pay for a good dating site, is that my issue?
Kissy Says:
NASAR, You are not even in the proper places to begin to meet the woman that you are seeking. You are meeting hood rats because you are dating in the hood. Sounds like you are from the hood but you have educated yourself without also properly changing your environment.. I would of named this post “Diary of a Educated Black Man Without a Plan” If you fail to plan, you plan to fail…But this is not a Dear Kissy, so I will leave my two cents at that and let the fellas comment.
62 Comments
Something just don't add up this dude's a fraud..
I know several who don't fit that category lol i've been here, there, all around. Small booty, big, there's no cut and dry mold to trifling behavior or loyalty lol Yall women are out of control with this all dudes are chasing big booties bullshit. I'm going to call BULL on dude having wrote this and being sincere. It reads like some BS to get a rise. Too cliched for me.
Exactly Tashie.
Oh wow I don’t think he would find anyone worth while with that attitude. I totally agree with your response to his comment. Well said Kissy! lol
Where is he finding these broads? He’s looking in all the wrong places….CLEARLY!
I really respect that……
Lol. Should I comment directly*thinking*
You find some really interesting things, if he was so educated he could have at least used the right spelling and wording. He said “lock” but by what was in parenthesis he meant “like”. This is all I hear males complain about in my area. It’s just like worry about yourself first and let the chips fall where they may
I find that a lot of educated men that complain about only meeting hood rats, baby mamas and gold diggers are shallow, overlooking the good women and go after women that look like video girls. You mean to tell me all the educated attractive black women out here that out number men and he can only find these types! SMH
And why hasn’t he looked in mosque (aint that where they pray at?) #imjustsayin
Duclair all Facebook comments on a ASKKISSY.COM blog POST transfer to the website
Women women…..
Aijalon — I wonder when was the last time he been to the masjid
Don’t sound that educated to me. Educated or not he’s making human mistakes. Positive is he don’t want baggage which is his personal preference nothing wrong with that. But dude seems to have a one track mind he should be well rounded. Wish him luck.
He needs to move out of the zone and look somewhere else or at least try out dating. Other then that, he should not be complaining rather he should walk another path.
@ tashie i am curious how is he making human mistakes?
I didn’t read through all of it, i didn’t have too. I’ve heard that lame mess one too many times. It’s weak dudes like him that have equally weak ass women talking about men are soft & bitches now. Yeah I said weak ass women because your following the lead of these dudes and birthing these chumps. If a brother is telling me he did everything right in life & his competition for a woman is a street dude, we have nothing left to talk about because I can’t deal with bitchass dudes. Smh.
Dude I’ll say this much. If you are so educated you wouldn’t have wrote this nonsense because it was simply based off of stereotypes. I know what you’re thinking. “He don’t know me!” But alas, the personality and immaturity shows in each paragraph. *exhibitA* All I want is a woman with a God Fearing, Big Booty, Career oriented ,Goals, Educated preferbly no kids (i want to experience parent hood with a 1st time parent) Definately not multiple kids by multiple men. I mean have some self respect and self value. If you value a woman on her ass then what is “self value” worth? I can go on and on with this petri dish of immaturity you presented, but I won’t. I gotta go, however I will say this. I think you have some issues and need to stop pointing fingers at ppl and learn why a good educated woman hasn’t made herself approachable to you. Phrase of the day is: Grow up!
Poor guy so clueless…educated but not educated on the right thing…smh…he need to listen to his friend….he knows how to get a woman in his league that he likes…that is the same thing he tryin to do right? His list longer than any chick i know…maybe he will learn
"THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!" "IF HE WAS ALL THAT, THE GOOD WOMAN AS YOU CALL THEM WOULD BE TEARING DOWN YOUR DOOR!" "WHAT THE HEY DO YOU LOOK LIKE?"
Common sense is sometimes better than all that he talking about. He probably dont want what want him! And then Shocked at his self for meeting the wrong Chics! Your Market Value must have Dropped:)
Shoot ” if you go sifting threw garbage, duh… you’re gonna pick up trash”!..smh
Well Mr educated. Real recognize Real and you got fake I’d! I’m not gonna talk on everything I’ve read from you but I’ll focus on this paragraph-All I want is a woman with a God Fearing, Big Booty, Career oriented ,Goals, Educated preferbly no kids (i want to experience parent hood with a 1st time parent) Definately not multiple kids by multiple men. I mean have some self respect and self value.- So does having a “big booty” equate to a good Woman having self value? I don’t think so but I do know that’s your problem right there. Your 5th grade composition was a petri dish of your personality which reeks of immaturity. You have issues! Instead of pointing fingers at who you wouldn’t date try to point at yourself and figure out why a “Good Woman” hasn’t made herself approachable to you. Key phrase for the day edu. Blk man: Grow the hell up!
@Nasar he’s human & he makes mistakes because of the places he frequents trying to find love just goes to show u all that education don’t supply common sense. I personally think he’s a fraud i could be wrong.
Women kill me with this video chicks mess hahaha who are these “video chicks” that dudes are going after hahahaha
Tywon when I say video chicks are big booty girls (Buffy the body) that he said he likes I know plenty of them in Chicago and sadly most of them have multiple children by different men
How well educated can you be? The grammar and typos in your post made it nearly impossible to read, let alone make sense. I'm sure if you seek out the "bog booty, walmart wearing, self valued" baby mama you want, you will be sure to find her! Problem is, no one will ever be good enough for you. Get past the superficial and start getting super real WITH YOUR SELF!
It's only a handful of good people out here looking to meet good people.The unfortunate thing is we are all catching heat for the last baby mama or guys look at you like your crazy for wanting something out of life.The saddest part of the story is that it's a brother…It's a shortage of employed black men out here.They either are living off of their mama or baby mama.They are struggling in the world because they have nothing positive going for them.I would simply say pray about it and keep your head up.What's for you is for you and no one can take that away from you.I currently live in the midwest and choose to be single that way I avoid those situations.Men here don't want a God fearing woman,they want a chick with weave and a VIP membership to the clubs!!Too funny!!!However some of do have class and goals.Just let God bless you and don't worry about these people maikng uneducated remarks…it is facebook
Diary of a Educated Black Man…. MY Facebook Fans Roasted the Poor Brother http://bit.ly/ohPiFQ
Diary of a Educated Black Man…. MY Facebook Fans Roasted the Poor Brother http://bit.ly/ohPiFQ
Diary of a Educated Black Man…. MY Facebook Fans Roasted the Poor Brother http://bit.ly/ohPiFQ
Diary of a Educated Black Man…. MY Facebook Fans Roasted the Poor Brother http://bit.ly/ohPiFQ
ASK KISSY POST | Diary of A Educated Black man – My facebook fans roasted him http://bit.ly/ohPiFQ
ASK KISSY POST | Diary of A Educated Black man – My facebook fans roasted him http://bit.ly/ohPiFQ
ASK KISSY POST | Diary of A Educated Black man – My facebook fans roasted him http://bit.ly/ohPiFQ
ASK KISSY POST | Diary of A Educated Black man – My facebook fans roasted him http://bit.ly/ohPiFQ
Educated Black man.
Very true!
thats alright!
Now, If We Can Get Some Hoodrats To Get Onboard Of This Frame Of Mind…
hey guys rim right here pls add! thank you so much kissy
I think it’s great that he is an educated black man considering the fact that there are some that are not per say..not to take away from them as a person..but I think the issue here is that he is so hung up on being educated like he just won man of the year. It speaks of arrogance and it makes him seem as if he is unapproachable. I’m a educated black woman but that doesn’t mean I have to make it known everywhere. It’s good that he has made it known to the universe what he is looking for in a woman but has he thought that just because he is “educated with career goals”that is what a good educated woman is looking for? I don’t even know this man but I will say this much..just by looking as this post as a good educated black woman with no kids and career goals who has a 10 year plan and desires the same in my partner I don’t think I would be interested only for the mere fact of his “educated arrogance” which means it maybe hard to make a simple decision or have disagreement without him feeling like he is always right or his way is the right way..which makes it a turn off. I think he needs to get a hefty slice of humble pie and calm that down a bit. Making it known that you are an Educated Black Man for your fb name makes it known already that the uneducated need not to apply, that you always have something to say even it’s wrong and that you’re always right. Not that you have to apologize for it but I will say that from my observations and what I analyze that is what I picked up from all of this. I could be wrong and if I am then I can admit that much but think about this Mr. Educated Black Man are you everything and mean everything that a good educated woman would want to consider for a partner? Which is the issue with most of us that we are always looking for something that we think will be good for us when in actuality we are not that good for it. You get back what you put out there. (Sorry so long..but I like to talk)
send a friend request nic! thanx for your input all opinions welcome
Yes part of your issue is that you are too cheap to pay for a good dating site. It’s amazing to me how people will pay for good food, good clothes or even shop for expensive items.. But you ask them in invest 20.00 a month into finding a SOULMATE and somehow that’s asking too much. You are looking for someone to share your life with. If you are “educated” spread the 20bucks a month across the rest of your life and see how much a good “match” actually costs. Do the math. (Don’t worry I will wait)
If the women you are meeting consider an educated Black man “corny” you really do need a dating site’s assistance because you clearly don’t know how to pick em. A woman who matches your criteria is too busy working to be out looking for a man.
Looking for a mate is a full time job. Approach it as such. Be methodical and driven. Don’t wait for a chance meeting. That’s like sitting at home waiting for a job to call YOU.
..and I somewhat agree with Nic. It’s okay to be an “Educated Black Man” but you shouldn’t feel compelled to lead with that. It makes everyone think you believe that to be the sum total of your existence.
I’d rather just be educated and let people discover that. No need to state the obvious. Being an educated person speaks for itself. It doesn’t need its own ad campaign.
@Nic Fivestarhairstylistandmua Harmon ~ Well, Talk On Brotha…
@Travis Williams ~ I Don’t Want To Work A Full-Time Job Finding A Man, I Want To Work A Full Time Job Keeping HIM…
Prima: You have to do both. You can’t keep a man you haven’t found.
@Prima your a good soul u keep being u. I do have a question for the educated brother from the bank. If you are all that we ask for advice from those that arent on your level… You are coming off judge mental and sad part is your probably a real cool brother that can talk about anything. But your favorite topic cant always be u. U need to date different types of women and listen. Thats helps you find that woman and the wolf in sheeps clothing. And dont have sex with all of them that will cloud your judgement. I had to do it. Work on the charm everything else will speak for itself. And the reason I asked the question is because that big booty chick is thinking it. And I seen man with the same vision as yours get got for it.
Educated Black man.
Very true!
thats alright!
Now, If We Can Get Some Hoodrats To Get Onboard Of This Frame Of Mind…
hey guys rim right here pls add! thank you so much kissy
I think it’s great that he is an educated black man considering the fact that there are some that are not per say..not to take away from them as a person..but I think the issue here is that he is so hung up on being educated like he just won man of the year. It speaks of arrogance and it makes him seem as if he is unapproachable. I’m a educated black woman but that doesn’t mean I have to make it known everywhere. It’s good that he has made it known to the universe what he is looking for in a woman but has he thought that just because he is “educated with career goals”that is what a good educated woman is looking for? I don’t even know this man but I will say this much..just by looking as this post as a good educated black woman with no kids and career goals who has a 10 year plan and desires the same in my partner I don’t think I would be interested only for the mere fact of his “educated arrogance” which means it maybe hard to make a simple decision or have disagreement without him feeling like he is always right or his way is the right way..which makes it a turn off. I think he needs to get a hefty slice of humble pie and calm that down a bit. Making it known that you are an Educated Black Man for your fb name makes it known already that the uneducated need not to apply, that you always have something to say even it’s wrong and that you’re always right. Not that you have to apologize for it but I will say that from my observations and what I analyze that is what I picked up from all of this. I could be wrong and if I am then I can admit that much but think about this Mr. Educated Black Man are you everything and mean everything that a good educated woman would want to consider for a partner? Which is the issue with most of us that we are always looking for something that we think will be good for us when in actuality we are not that good for it. You get back what you put out there. (Sorry so long..but I like to talk)
send a friend request nic! thanx for your input all opinions welcome
Yes part of your issue is that you are too cheap to pay for a good dating site. It’s amazing to me how people will pay for good food, good clothes or even shop for expensive items.. But you ask them in invest 20.00 a month into finding a SOULMATE and somehow that’s asking too much. You are looking for someone to share your life with. If you are “educated” spread the 20bucks a month across the rest of your life and see how much a good “match” actually costs. Do the math. (Don’t worry I will wait)
If the women you are meeting consider an educated Black man “corny” you really do need a dating site’s assistance because you clearly don’t know how to pick em. A woman who matches your criteria is too busy working to be out looking for a man.
Looking for a mate is a full time job. Approach it as such. Be methodical and driven. Don’t wait for a chance meeting. That’s like sitting at home waiting for a job to call YOU.
..and I somewhat agree with Nic. It’s okay to be an “Educated Black Man” but you shouldn’t feel compelled to lead with that. It makes everyone think you believe that to be the sum total of your existence.
I’d rather just be educated and let people discover that. No need to state the obvious. Being an educated person speaks for itself. It doesn’t need its own ad campaign.
@Nic Fivestarhairstylistandmua Harmon ~ Well, Talk On Brotha…
@Travis Williams ~ I Don’t Want To Work A Full-Time Job Finding A Man, I Want To Work A Full Time Job Keeping HIM…
I read your article and it provided an interesting perspective. W.E.B. Dubois mentioned the talented 10% and that’s also true of dating and intelligence. So few African American’s have their prioritites in place. How many articles and rap songs have to tell us: it’s cool to floss but don’t buy an $80k car before you buy a house? We are a nation of consumers and baby momma’s (LIKE NO OTHER CULTURE). The lost understand the lost and cling to their disfunctional principles and ideas. Those who take no preparation in life (marriage, evaluating a mate based on more than sex/looks/car/image, INVESTING in your future so you can pay for your child’s education, and setting moral and goal examples) out number those who don’t.
Couple that with black denial and I can understand where you are coming from. I’ve reviewed the statistics, worked with youth, and have seen the aftermath of the crazy decisions people make and their impact on the next generation.
**Open your playground. Make sure you choose a person that matches your mindset and not necessarily your color. **Go to professional meetings, social functions, and get involved with organizations. You seem on point with your thoughts and preparation for the future so the chances of you running into someone the same way at a club, random encounter, or at the bar is rare. The only exception to this rule —-upscale lounges.
*You seem a child of the each generation do better so make sure you partner with someone on the same page. That creates black star power and generational wealth instead of generational poverty.
The president chose his wife for a reason. He was not going to marry someone that wasn’t on point and on the road to success in deed and by life preparation.
Funny that the average everyday person requires all this bling/flash and probably has nowhere near the 1 year savings or money for a rainy day but the president’s wife happily shops at Target.
F.Y.I. I love what you said…..
I personally refuse to settle because when you settle for less you get less than what you settled for.
*Here’s another one. I won’t knock a pork chop off of your plate if you don’t knock one off of mine. (what does that mean? don’t look for a come up or handout from me)